My commencement speech at the University of Pittsburgh

Inside jokes and encouragement in today's political environment

I had the honor of serving as the commencement speaker at the University of Pittsburgh winter commencement.

It was a great ceremony with 1200 graduates! Chancellor Joan Gabel is doing a great job there and was a wonderful host. I meet with students ahead of doing these to get the inside jokes and also figure out what they want to hear about. They pushed me to talk about the election, which was something to be done with care. I think I found a good way to do it. (You can decide.)

Video here (starts at 9 minutes in) and text below.

Here’s the text of my remarks:

Congratulations, Graduates!!

And thank you, Chancellor Gabel. It is such an honor to be back at UPitt.

[boo]

Don’t worry, I learned Rule #1.

Hail to Pitt!

Say it with me!

[Hail to Pitt!]

Good work, everybody. You’ve endured a lot to get here in a very troubled world. Pandemic, international conflict, divisive politics, and not one but two – and soon to be three -- of the hottest years on record.

Pitt took good care of you. They let you come to this beautiful American city and pursue your academic dreams. They gave you a lot of degree programs to choose from. And they let you put on your blue and gold swag with pride.

Of course, they did try to charge you a lot for those hoodies and sweatshirts. Thankfully, you were extremely fortunate, because you could get them a lot cheaper on the street from someone named Chas.

Sadly, Chas isn’t with us anymore, and that’s a tough loss for the Pitt community. Give it up for Chas, everybody.

The university apparently also let bugs get in your food at the dining hall. I think the bugs were just lost. They were probably just trying to get to Hemingway’s for the pitcher of the night.

Either that or they were trying to get to the Cathedral of Learning so they could get in the Cathy Club.

Whatever that is.

There’s one thing those bugs weren’t doing – and that’s putting a robe on and getting a degree. You’re about to get one shortly – and we’re here to celebrate, that’s for sure. But first, three things to think about from your friendly neighborhood graduation speaker.

Nobody’s Normal

I don’t think I can stand in front of this many students and not mention the fact that we are in a mental health crisis among young people. As many as 50% of college and graduate school age students have sought mental health services. That’s a lot of people here today who are hurting. I can understand why anyone would be struggling given all that’s going on in the world – and especially with the stress of college and graduate school. Lots of pundits want to tell you why this is happening, but actually only you know. For sure, part of it is an outdated and biased idea of what it means to be ‘normal’ that most of us can’t conform to.

You may notice that my hand movements and the lack of modulation in my vocal tone are a little unusual. That’s because I’m autistic. Lots of famous and successful people have had this diagnosis. But far more autistic people -- and those who had autism but were never diagnosed, and therefore never given the supports they needed -- were much less fortunate, sometimes requiring constant care and exhibiting much higher rates of anxiety and depression than the general population. And that’s partly because, particularly in some sectors of society, our awkward traits come with significant stigma.

As an autistic person, I have the greatest admiration for the MBAs who had to do so many excruciating group projects.

For me, that would be all nine circles of hell.

Now one reason I’m telling you this is so you know that if you have mental health struggles of your own, you can still be the speaker at Pitt winter commencement one day. In fact, all of us up here in our robes with our fancy degrees may look completely together, but every one of us has had challenges just like you may be having. So as my GW colleague Richard Grinker says, remember that if you look closely enough, nobody’s normal.

Institutions aren’t perfect

There’s an elephant in this big room. Actually, a donkey and an elephant, because we just had a very divisive election. And the number of votes for the two candidates were so close that for every person who is disappointed and scared about the future, there’s someone else who is happy and excited. You’re being handed quite a big challenge with all of this. And my advice is not to listen to any pundit who tries to tell you why someone voted: there’s no way any one analysis applies to everyone who voted one way or the other.

But we do know that part of the story is a big loss of trust in institutions. And many of you will leave here to work for these institutions. Medicine, science, law, journalism, big corporations, government, education. All lost a significant amount of public trust during the pandemic. And that’s something the institutions need to be humble about. It’s not going to work to cynically dismiss every criticism.

So, if you leave here to work for one of these institutions, remember that none of them is perfect. Be part of helping them reform and engage their critics. Many of these institutions, including higher education, made immeasurable contributions to success for all, but they also owe everyone an explanation when they fall short. And a plan to do better.

Take the University of Pittsburgh. Sure, they did a lot of great stuff for you, but that website that you used to sign up for housing really sucks. I mean, you may as well have been logging on to neopets.

And they made you change your password every two weeks and use Duo mobile for multi-factor authentication every time you wanted to do anything. And the phishing tests!

Well, bad news. If you go to work almost anywhere, you’re going to spend even more time on multi-factor authentication and phishing tests. So maybe focus on some bigger problems at your new home. Like whether your institution is being straight with folks when they mess up. And whether the leadership is answering questions from stakeholders and reporters – and not just hiding behind canned statements.

Go love these institutions so much you want to make them better. And hold everyone there to a higher standard, including yourself.

Degrees aren’t everything

The other big divide in American politics is between people who do and don’t have a college degree. And in about 30 minutes, you’re going to switch from one of those groups to the other. As new graduates, you will have a chance to try to bridge this divide. Because the knowledge and credentials we’re here to celebrate are good, but they’re not everything.

Brains are great, but heart and courage are just as important.

Especially if you plan on defying gravity.

In my own field of science, we lost a lot of trust during the pandemic because many of us thought that scientific principles should take precedence over everything else. And we were too strident about expressing that. And too reluctant to admit when we made a mistake or had to change our views on the basis of new data. It’s no wonder that 47% of Americans think scientists feel superior to others. Ouch. That’s on us, and we’ve got to fix that. Knowledge won’t benefit everyone unless we bridge this divide.

You already know how to talk to people you disagree with. You’ve certainly been able to express your disagreements with the students of West Virginia University. Especially when you were explaining your views on their intrafamily relationships.

But in the future, you may need to try a smoother way to communicate your differences.

Grace, compassion, humility are in short supply. We all need more. Fortunately, you care so much about the future, that you’ll find them all if you look. And that will help you use your knowledge and credentials for the benefit of everyone.

You’re right on schedule

We’re going a long way toward all these goals today because all of you are graduating!

Because whether you took French Kiss and History of Jazz -- or organic chemistry with George Bandik or Pete Bell -- you’re about to be Pitt Alumni.

And we know from experience that Pitt Alumni change the world for the better.

Now some of the talk about changing the world that always shows up at graduations might make you uneasy. Some of you might not have your grand plan worked out. If that’s the case, you’re right on schedule. Most of you who do have a plan are going to change it multiple times.

So don’t worry if you don’t have it all figured out yet. And remember that whatever you do next, it’s the right thing if it’s what you want. Try to tune out what your parents and your advisers think you want. They don’t know everything that you know about what’s right.

They also didn’t get handed this divided world where everyone is obsessed with who belongs and who doesn’t. A world filled with uncertainty about politics, artificial intelligence, and the climate.

Tune it out and do what you think is right. You have the tools to figure it and persist.

And when things get really tough, you can still come back to Pittsburgh to see Don dancing outside Stack’d -- and remember how great it was to buy cheap swag from Chas.

So that’s my talk.

Nobody is normal.

Institutions aren’t perfect.

Degrees aren’t everything.

And only you can decide what to do now.

With these ideas, you’re ready for anything.

And remember, no matter what life throws at you, there’s one thing you can always cling to: you will never have to climb cardiac hill again.

Congratulations to the class of 2024!